Dolph Vs. Stone Cold

Action heavyweights Steve Austin (THE CONDEMNED) and Dolph Lundgren (the original PUNISHER), who appeared together in THE EXPENDABLES, schedule a rematch in THE PACKAGE. Believe it or not, it actually squeezed into a single theater last month just a few days before its release on DVD and Blu-ray. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin may be a big shot in the wrestling ring, but he’s little better than a hunk of redwood on film, and he comes off even worse next to Dolph’s chiseled charisma.

Austin plays Tommy Wick, an enforcer who collects debts for loan shark Big Doug (Eric Keenleyside). Tommy’s wife (Kristen Kerr) wants him to settle down and take a job as a bar bouncer, but, Doug pays well, provides health benefits (!), and lets Tommy work off his incarcerated little brother Eddie’s (a miscast Locklyn Munro, also in Austin’s RECOIL) debt. He can settle that debt with one last job: deliver a book-sized package to The German (Lundgren), a sophisticated epicurean whom a lot of people try to kill. You and I, having seen other movies, know this job isn’t the milk run Doug promises, but Tommy somehow doesn’t. Before he knows it, guys with large guns are chasing him all over the Pacific Northwest.

Austin’s dull presence aside, THE PACKAGE is an entertaining B-picture, mostly because of Lundgren’s charm, but also because director Jesse V. Johnson (THE LAST SENTINEL) keeps the action, bits of well-placed humor, and a couple of plot surprises chugging along. He favors letting large men with large fists pound them into faces, which benefits the clumsy Austin, though THE PACKAGE has no shortage of ammunition fired. Former kickboxing pro Jerry Trimble, who used to star in films exactly like this one in the 1990s (like LIVE BY THE FIST and ONE MAN ARMY), has a flashy fight scene with Austin, and audiences anticipating a showdown between the two stars won’t be disappointed.